Online Dating: Protecting Your Heart – and Your Savings

The caller ID flashed: Eugene Police airport officer.
“How can I help?”
“I’ve got another one,” said the officer’s weary voice. My heart sank.
“How much did they lose?” I managed to ask.
Then the word I always dread.
“Everything.”

Targeting and devastating older adults who simply want companionship. This is the horrifying reality behind today’s romance scams.
Sadly, the above isn’t a cautionary tale, it’s a real story. The woman’s name is withheld to protect her privacy, but her experience is one shared by far too many. She was lonely, hopeful, and believed she had finally met the perfect man online. He was attentive, affectionate, and always seemed to say exactly what she needed to hear.
As their relationship deepened, his requests grew from small favors to urgent pleas. Each sounded believable, even compassionate. Soon she was sending him money, until he finally convinced her
to do the unthinkable: sell her home to fund the down payment on the dream house he promised they’d share.
She wired money then waited at the airport for the man who had promised her a new life, a fresh start, and a future filled with love, to step off the plane and into her arms.
But he never arrived.
And he never would.
She wasn’t meeting her soulmate; she was meeting the reality of a romance scam that took everything from her. She, who had wanted nothing more than to love and be loved in return.
It’s a familiar tale: an online connection grows into daily conversations, only for the “perfect match” to eventually be unmasked as a scammer.
Today’s romance scammers use AI to craft convincing fake identities and study your social media to learn your interests, emotions, and vulnerabilities. They then create a person that mirrors what you want, your hobbies, memories, and desires, while hiding who they truly are.
It’s manipulation wrapped in affection, and it’s targeting older men and women in growing numbers.
Protect yourself from romance scams by staying cautious with online relationships, especially if someone won’t meet in person or asks for money. Never share personal or financial information with someone you haven’t met or whose “people” you haven’t met.
Too good to be true? Then it is. Scammers push for quick, irreversible payments like wire transfers, gift cards, money apps, or cryptocurrency. Never send money to someone you’ve only met online or known briefly. If you suspect a scam, stop contact, talk to someone you trust, report it to the Federal Trade Commission, and alert the site or app where you met them.
The most powerful love story you can write is the one where you choose to protect yourself.

-Janina Rager 50 Plus Magazine

Janina Rager, Eugene Police Community Engagement Officer with the Eugene Police, is committed to educating people for their safety and well-being.