Take off the (figurative) mask

by Dianne Dennis

In 2019 I was working on a book about how we all wear social masks, and the dynamics that lead us to act like and then become a false self. Talk about manifesting in the material life: Covid 19 comes along, and everyone’s wearing actual masks! Irony?

It’s not lost on me that we are conditioned from birth to act certain ways — “acting” being the operative word. Our parents said: “Don’t act that way.” “Sit up straight.” “Don’t cry.” Etc. etc.

The real you and the real me got squeezed into the shadows while our false self, created by social conditioning, became the masks we wore. Over time, we believed the false self — the mask — was our real self, and in the process, we lost our authentic expression in a million ways. How could I imagine becoming a radio host as an adult when I was told to shut up as a child?

We continually adopt and practice roles in this play called life. These roles come in the form of archetypes in relationships: wife, husband, mother, father. They also come in the form of our professions: nurse, doctor, accountant, chef.

And here we are in 2022, wearing the mask, a false persona we wear to comply and please others. And now the Covid mask hides even more: our facial expressions which are our sacred nonverbal language, hiding another layer of our authentic expression. In the meantime, it is not a stretch to say there is a deep loneliness brewing in the hearts of many.

If everything happens for a reason, then why not use this time of isolation and incubation to dust off that authentic self, crying out for expression and notice. Get to know who you really are, the real you — not the tapped down, watered down, beige version of your personality, but the real one with a wide range of colorful emotional and creative expression. Always wanted to paint, but gave it up for a practical life? Pick up the brush. Be more of you. The world is waiting and will be better for it.

Diane Dennis is a RN, certified life coach, author, columnist and writer. Contact her at dianedenimc@gmail.com.

The original version of this article appeared on Medium here https://dianechangeagent.medium.com/